Birch, please.

When it comes to Christmas trees, real or fake, I hate them.


Gracie Wetherington, Copy Editor

Christmas trees are a loved tradition all over America. Tons of people spend time putting together a tree or going to pick out one in a field. They put ornaments on the tree and drink hot cocoa with the ones they love.

However, for me, the case is different. I do not like Christmas trees. I do not care if they are real or fake; they are just too much work.

Real trees are a pain. I have to go out to a field in the freezing cold and spend an hour trying to pick out the perfect tree. Then once I finally find the right one, I have to stand around and wait for the workers to cut it down and trim it up. Do not even get me started on trying to get it in the car and drive it home.

Once I get the tree home, trying to get it through the door is a huge hassle. It drops needles everywhere and is hard to get upright in the stand. Then I am stuck vacuuming up needles and watering the tree every day for a month.

Fake trees are no better. I have to haul the heavy box upstairs or down from the attic and into the living room. Then I have to take out each individual branch and fluff them one by one. What’s even worse than fluffing them is trying to put each branch in the right slot to get the tree put together. I have to look at those annoying little worn-down tabs, with letters I can barely read, and try to guess where they go.

Decorating the tree is a whole other event in itself. Dragging out the boxes of decade-old ornaments that smell musty from being stored in the attic is no good time, either. Then I have to try and perfectly space out the millions of ugly ornaments I made in elementary school, or the cheesy ones my grandma bought that my mom makes me put out to make her happy.

For some reason my parents also feel the need to make this an all-day event with the whole family. So I have to waste my day working on a tree I couldn’t care less about when I could be doing literally anything else. Scheduling the big day is even harder then putting the tree together, and we already know how I feel about that. It takes a thousand texts back and forth just to get everyone in the family to pick a free day that does not mess up anyone’s schedule. Then a thousand more texts to figure out a good time since nobody wants to wake up too early or they are busy in the afternoon, so they can’t stay too late.

Besides all of the work it takes, a tree is a very basic tradition. I’d rather have something more fun and interesting to wake up to Christmas morning than a boring old tree that I dreaded putting up. Maybe if there was a giant stuffed Christmas penguin to put the presents under I would be more interested.

Christmas only lasts so long. I take all that time and effort to put up a tree just to have to take it down and pack it all up before new year’s comes. Then I have to lug all that stuff back up to the attic. If I get a real tree that year, it is even more work to try and figure out a way to get rid of the huge thing.

Personally, I think the tree is the least important part of Christmas. I mean, if I wake up to presents and good food, it is going to be a pretty good day whether there is a tree or not.

Now, do not take this as me hating Christmas decorations. I love Christmas snowmen, penguins, Santa, etc. A tree, however, is just too much work for nothing.